Today was kickass!
Actually, so far, the whole week wasn't all that bad.
I got this nasty cold on Thurs.
That sucked ass, but oh well...Had Thanksgiving here at my house, with my grandma.
Hehehe, got to make cranberry sauce. I love that stuff. It tasted kinda funky though...to me at least. No one else thought so.
I guess it was because I was sick. Grr.
Watched Ice Age on Thurs. with my grandmother. That was cool. She was in a good mood.
Then, Fri. morning-ish we headed to Rinconada.
I was all bummed 'cuz I felt like crap but I thought I would start feeling better once I got there.
But I didn't. Damnit...
Most of my family was there. Ian was too....he and the Three Holy Terrors were being.....pains in the asses...And it wasn't just because I was feeling bad.
Anyhoo....Missed out on the paintball game Saturday because I had a bad headache.
But, what made up for everything was that I got to visit family I haven't seen in over 6 months AND! I got my truck!
Wooo!
Unfortunately, I couldn't really drive it home. I did not want to drive a standard through Santa Fe when I haven't driven one in almost a year...and when I don't really know how to work one anyway.
That sucked....So, my dad drove it home. I drove the truck home...and Aric went with dad.
Eh.
Head ached all the way back....ears were being all painful...I think I got both of them with minor infections...Grr.
But yay!!! I got my truck. And what really rocks was that while I was all excited about getting it, I still had the fact that I would have to spend 3 or 4 hundred dollars on it before I would be able to drive it safely. But! Uncle Neal fixed it before he brought it down here ::does a little dance:: Woohoo! So, now it's drive-able. Still needs some things worked on but I can deal.
Hehehehehe....

When I got home I buried myself in WarCraftIII.
Beat the game! Kickass!
Aric was all mad because he hasn't been able to beat the last level and I beat in in 2 hours.
Took me three times but I did it. I'm rubbing it in his face ::evil grin::
The end cinema was ok. You basically saw it coming the whole time but it was still cool. Ending credits were really funny.
They were making fun of a whole bunch of stuff.
Mmm...hot chocolate and cranberry sauce....yay...Well, I'm happy now so I guess I should go to bed.
Wanna feel better tomorrow but I don't think I'll go to practice even if I do....asking for too much trouble.
Plus, I think I infected enough people already.

Woo! Fixed it!
Finally...Stupid mouse.
It was the mouse that was broken...and the mouse they got to replace it...well...they didn't make sure it worked.
So, all I had to do was trade it for another mouse...Pffft.
Anyhoo.
I don't know what I want to do now...
Should I go do something productive...or be a bum some more.
Choices choices...
Gonna fight tomorrow. Yay!
Actually I probably should go clean up my room...damnit...

How can people be so blind where they, themselves, are concerned?
I look and see the victims in the world... and standing by them are the people that are so stupid they fuck up their lives all by themselves and then blame it on other people.
And most of the time, though they may not subconsciously know it...they enjoy screwing up the lives of those around them.
And so those around them become victims...but they don't know it until they are so wrapped up in the web if insanity and despair that they can't find a way out...or in turn find that they don't want to find a way out...
It's sickening and depressing.
And frustrating and painful when you find someone you know needs help...but wont actually work to get better....

::heaves sigh:: Sorry...today wasn't all that inspiring I guess you could say.
Gonna go bury myself in WarCraftIII...

Stupid....whore....dog....
She ran off today...I would have skinned her had I been home but my mom was the one to let her out...

I don't want any more puppies!

Dangit, seems like I just got rid of the last litter.
Need to get her fixed....but every time we have the time to...there's no money.
Grrr.
Or we forget.
But whatever...

Dude, my finger got all red where I burned it, then turned white in the middle.
Never had a burn do that....It was the size of a quarter for a while...now...it's...dime-ish...and the white went away...

Couldn't get the computer fixed so I called Ed.
He thinks it's the software rather then the hardware like I was hoping.
::rolls eyes:: Wait until I tell my dad...he's gonna love that...

I was about to skin Spencer today.
What an angry child...and...personally I don't really blame him.
His family is even more fucked up then mine.
I was sitting on the couch reading with Trevor in the chair beside the couch playing his Advanced Game Boy....he would get mad at it and throw it across the room....stare at the opposite wall for a couple of minutes...get up...go get the game boy...play for about 10 minutes...get mad...throw it across the room again.
Dude, if that were me...doing that in front of ANYONE in my family, including Bruce and Aunt Dana I would get skinned.
I don't know why they let him get away with it though...
Well, maybe I do...Kids take after their parents alot...I know that...and that is a VERY typical Bruce reaction to anything he disagrees with...weather it be something of his or someone else's...
Makes me sick.
He destroys a lot of stuff...and when you have that kind of thing staring you in the face every morning... you pick it up, but when you get chewed out for it...you get angry...which is what Spencer is doing...and...I think Bruce and Dana have just given' up trying to teach them not to.
::shrugs::
Nothing I can do about it....No matter how much I want to...

Don't know why I'm talking about this...mind just wondering I guess.
I was talking to Nicole earlier and we realized a lot of people we know have been really depressed lately...
I thought it was weird...
Hmmm...need to go to bed I think.
Keep yawning.

Do be do be dooo...
Damnit...I burned my finger earlier...now it's being all...annoying ::heaves sigh::
Anyhoo.
Not much to tell...Just felt like posting....something at least.
The new/old computer's being screwy and wont acknowledge the mouse...stupid...technology...and now my mom is wanting me to call Ed.
This has happened before. I know I fixed it last time...I just need to wait until I can remember how...or call Ed... which...I dunno...I don't want to call him every single time we have computer problems...especially if I think I can fix them myself.
But whatever.
This cat is getting bigger and bigger by the minute...Now my mom is wanting to bring her in...I...kinda do...but not for the same reasons...If she wasn't preggy...she'd stay outside..I'm not real keen on having a cat that attacks in the house...but then again I don't want to find frozen kitties in the middle of winter...damnit.

Yeah...Ed is saying that he's not finding any jobs...and so...I'm not working...and last night it dawned on me that I'm only getting paid enough for baby-sitting to cover the expense of gas going back and forth from baby-sitting...which sucks major ass...

Dude, today sucked.

My dad was being all pissy last night....That...sucked too.
But it didn't help that Aric and he hadn't told me that they were planning on going to get fire wood today.
And so Aric told me like, an hour before I got home and so I asked dad what was going on and he got this attitude.
He basically told me that I had better not have made any plans because I was going to go help load...and I would have to cancel anything I did have planned.
Ahhh....That made me sooo angry. I hate it when my family does that.
They expect me to drop everything to do....whatever.
Grrr.
So...He then tells me that I have to get up at 6:30am...Ok...fine, but my alarm clock broke or something because it didn't go off and so they were all....ickish....Aric wasn't helping...
So, we go and get gas...and then for some reason, Fred...this guy that Sandi knows is now going with us to help...So, my dad fills up his truck with gas. That's like, a lot of money.
And my dad brought the goose neck! Dude, what the hell. We don't need that much wood.
The cool thing was that I got to visit with Daveed and Uncle Charles for a while. They met us at the Phillip's in Edgewood on their way to our house because they had to finish some swords.
So, we drive into Tijeras and go to the ranger station there to get the permit and guess who's car I saw....Greg's space ship thing. Then I remembered that something was going on with the boy scouts....and I had forgotten...So I was kicking myself for that.
We got a permit for 4 cords of wood for $10. Not too bad. 2 cords were gonna be for us and 2 were for Fred....Now, I guess, the only real reason for us getting wood was to help out Fred because he didn't have any heat and needed wood but didn't have anyone to go up there and help him load it...so my dad volinteered....
Well, somehow the map gets screwed up...and we're basically following Fred because supposedly he knows where he's going and I'm not paying any mind....
We end up driving up and around and down the wrong freakin' mountain because we turned at Tajique instead of Monzano....Wasts three hours of our time...
But we didn't know this and after a while decided that it's just not gonna happen because the farther we go the worse the roads get because it had been snowing.
So, we turn around, and when we get back to the paved road they realize what happened...So! We drive all the way to Monzano where Fred then tells us his back is really hurting him and he's just gonna go home.
::snarl::
That puts my dad in a really great mood...But we go ahead and go up...and there's no wood where they said there would be...and my dad's mood just went down hill after that...especially when we had to fuck up the tires driving over stumps because my dad doesn't know how to plan ahead...He kept say, "Oh, well, we'll just drive through here and look and see if there's any wood over there to cut" and then he would get the goose neck stuck...and he'd have to drive all over the fucking place....
He kicked us out of the car to tell him where he was going...and Aric doesn't know how to signal worth shit...
Dad would tell him to watch this tree and tell him how close he got and all that...well...Aric would watch the tree....and that was it. He'd just stand there and gaze off into la la land...Yeah, he'd tell Dad when he was about to hit it...but yeah...so...fucking yeah...
So, Dad started yelling at Aric and then Aric started yelling at me and so I ended up having hear both of them bitch...headache got worse...I got sick of it and stomped off...They didn't like that but fuck them...
After stomping around in the middle of nowhere, getting as far away from them as possible I started to feel better...'cuz stomping just does that.
It also helped that I wasn't stuck in the house....That would have been pure hell.
Came back...let them yell some more, then I told them that I wanted to go home...only, with more 4 letter words...Both of them shut up.
It was weird...so, everything was kinda quiet while Dad thought about it I guess...after a while he decided he wasn't leaving without some wood....::rolls eyes::
So we drive...and drive...with the bumps...and my ribs weren't happy...but yeah. We finally found a place with some wood...
But it was way the hell away from the truck...and Aric and I were the ones that had to carry it while Dad cut it with the chain saw.
Stupid...yeah...Anyhoo
With the chain saw Dad couldn't talk so it got better...I started picking on Aric...Hehe...I can spit farther then him...Righty.
So, after about 4 hours...Dad stalked up to the truck and we went to find another place...and once again got stuck. Only this time we couldn't get out...
Fucking A, right?
I was so sick by then I just wanted to crawl away and die.
The only way out was to take the chain saw to a whole bunch of stumps...and downed trees...(Yeah, we found a whole bunch of them when we were done ::snarl::)
That took another 2 hours....
'course, by then I fucked up my ribs...and so I was having problems breathing again...and so I couldn't carry anything...but forward ho, right?
After that we got into the truck and were basically silent on the hour drive home...Aric fell asleep...in the back of the truck...and I was happy...or at least content to..not be unhappy...Or something...
Aric and Dad decided that they wanted to get some movies since we were gonna go by the video place anyway...so, I called mom and let her know we were on our way home...and, usually...especially if I'm cooking...that means that we're gonna be home in about 30 to 45 minutes and to get supper started...Well...That didn't happen.
I had to cook supper...get Aric to clean out the freakin' dish washer (no easy feat...), then I had to put more dishes into it...clean up after supper...call the VC and try to make plans for the hike tomorrow...but no one wanted to go anyway so I canceled it. Now I have to wait for clothes to dry...Have to find more garb...find gear...and tomorrow I have to wake up at 7:00 so I have time to do chores, go into town to get food for lunches...come back, pack...and then leave for Toys for Tots which starts at 9:00.
Fuck...
My mom is mad at me because I got angry at her for making me cook supper...It was her turn...I cooked for almost all of last week...And she's saying that she does it every other day...I swear, she comes up with those stories and actually believes them until I come up with proof that it didn't happen...then she throws a fit because "she doesn't feel good" and I end up doing it anyway.
So what's the fucking point....
I'm just gonna go...hide or something...

send it... [Nov. 16th, 2002|06:37 am]
[ mood | indifferent ]
[ music | Nadda ]

Righty, so, it snowed today.
Thought that was cool.
Baby-sat for three hours....Got to see A.J.
In fact! We had him the whole day. Drug him to my cousin's house.
He had a blast. Made a whole bunch of noise, then I threw him and Bethany outside in the snow to 'cool' down.
Trevor was annoying the hell out of me. And I guess he knew it because he staid arms length from me.
Dude! I was talking to Uncle Bruce and he started hinting that Trevor had a crush on me....That's not right!.
::spaz::

But yeah, anyway. Met Dawn's latest boy toy today. He had long hair...she doesn't usually go out with guys with long hair....Weird.
It's funny. When she brings them over they never talk very much, like, they're intimidated by her and she's half their size.
The only one that actually talked and we had fun with was Hayden, Captain of the baronial heavy guard.
He's still fun. He also picks on me a lot...and he's got the rest of his guard doing it. I don't...know what to think of that.
But yeah, she dropped him like a hot potato.
I get different stories from both of them so ::shrugs::
I tend to lean towards his story though. It sounds so like her.
Not to say that she's lying.
She just sees things a whole lot differently then normal people. That side of the family does.
Anyhoo...don't know why I got into that.
Brett is over and he and Aric are playing Halo.
::grin::

I'm gonna go now.

Crys~

Ok, so, I think this post is gonna be just about what happened on Sun....and my opinion...of course.
And, if you guys don't want to hear it, you don't have to read it. This is why it's in my deadjournal.

Ok, yes, smoking is a disgusting habit, but that's my reaction to it. I don't think people should judge other people that smoke. It's their choice and if they don't want to see it that way, fine. Unless of course they're pushing that habit onto others.
Which, I don't believe Logan and Miguel were doing. Although, I don't think they should have broken out the cigs with Julie in the car with them.
But, I'm fairly sure from what I know about both of them that if Julie had said anything about not wanting to breath their second hand smoke, they would have stopped.
But instead of doing that she decided to 'lose respect' for those people. That's also her choice. She didn't want to speak up. Until later.
But the impression I got from Julie is that she doesn't know what to really think about it.
Now, I think everyone in the group agrees that Nae is a pushy person ::grins::
And, if she's concerned for a person because of a bad habit, she's bound to act strongly.


All in all I think everyone really over reacted and they just need to get over it.
So guys, find someway to make up because I really don't think smoking is a good reason to break a good friendship.

Love you guys.
Crys~

Woo! Got to hang out with the group last night. Yay.
I was all happy.
And Marty and Logan weren't really mad at me so that made it even better.

We didn't see a movie as planned but that was ok.
At that point I didn't feel like wasting 2 + hours watching a TV screen.
Hehe, we saw Pricilla, Queen of the Desert. I'm never gonna view those actors the same ever again.

Marty was being cool. Only said "Let's do something" once, and then let it go.
Holly wasn't there to bitch.

Kirby was there! And he talked!

I didn't know what to do. I feel as if I have to guard myself around him now and I don't enjoy that feeling....
Didn't help anything that my ribs started hurting. I don't know what I did.
...Maybe I slept on them wrong. I talked to my dad about it.
He's had lots of rib injuries and he said that there didn't have to be any bruising for you to chip or crack a rib. So I dunno....Maybe it isn't muscle...It seems like muscle damage would get better after a while. ::shrugs::
And damnit, there was a group hug. Love 'em.
But damn that hurt like hell. As soon as my ribs get better I want another one.
I'm trying to think what could have made my ribs mad.
The only thing I can think of was when Marty and I started shoving each other.
Now that I really think about it, it was just after we went and checked out the 'Big Truck' at the fire station that I started having problems breathing. And I had slammed into Marty with that side just before we left there....Hmm...maybe

We called Nicole! Hehe, that was fun.
Got to talk to her and everything. We passed Nae's phone around.
Why is it that whenever I'm with or just talking to Nae and Nicole I get their names mixed up?
That makes me mad. And I do it every time. Grr.
I'm sure they don't like it either.

Well, gotta run.
Buh bye

Crys~

Kinda glad I didn't post last night. I was all....gloomy and doomy.
Today went ok I suppose.
Dad was being a pain but whatever...don't really blame him. Just wish he would get his shit together.
Didn't do as much as I was supposed to do.

My ribs are feeling better though! Yay.
Or they were.
I got bored, finished my book and didn't really have anything to do so I started picking on Aric who was playing Halo.
I'd like, stand in front of the TV...He'd freak. So I'd leave.
Hehe, I started poking him with my foot which was distracting him.
Aric's fun to bug. He'll totally spaz out.
I got to laughing so hard my ribs started hurting again. They're just aching right now. I can move a lot more then I could before.
Not sure if I want to fight on Sun. but I probably will.
Everyone was all...wanting me to...do stuff last Sun.
I dunno. I'm sure that didn't really make sense but yeah.
Why does it sound like it's hailing?
Dude...It's trying to.
Hm, can't decide if that's a bad thing or a good thing.
I wanna see Ghost Ship tomorrow. And I want it to be good! Not stupid like I hear it's supposed to be.

Pissed Marty off royally last night. And Logan too I think.
But oh well I guess...
Nothing I can do about it.

I need to go make some tea or something...My stomache isn't very happy at the moment

Hehehe, went into town today.
Had to take my grandmother to the doctor because she's been having dizzy spells and what not.
He told her a bunch of bullshit that he could have told her over the phone....I hate doctors.

Anyhoo. After that we went to Wally World and I got some stuff...spent like half of what I was expecting to spend.
And!
My grandmother got me two shirts...Hehehe....they look so damn good on me...
Early Christmas presents.
She does that every time. It's funny.

My stupid ribs started acting up again...Her car is like...super uncomfortable. Not only did it start aggravating my ribs but I guess since I've been favoring that side, my back shoulder muscles have been really tense and shit so driving her car threw them all sorts of out of whack.

Still got a cold. Not nearly as bad as it was yesterday though. That sucked...I ended up being snappish with people who didn't deserve it...Didn't help that my Mom was being a bitch. She was blaming all this shit on me...and then telling me that I should pitch in more...that I wasn't doing enough for the family and that I was a real bitch to live with...

Hmm....need to go get ready for VC meeting.

Crys

[Nov. 5th, 2002|04:36 pm]
[ mood | frustrated ]
[ music | "Remember Me" by Hoobastank ]

Dude, sneezing hurts when your ribs are sore.
Actually, I don't think he got my ribs per say...I've been trying to stretch and figure out why it hurts and all that.
Like, if they were bruised, or if they were chipped...or broken..
But, there's no discoloration at all. Which kinda sucks. I mean, if they're gonna hurt this much, I want to at least have a big black and blue mark or something...But yeah...
So, I think that he got me in between the ribs...and so maybe there was some damage to the muscle. I don't bruise unless it's bone bruising...so, yeah.
Last night it felt like my head was gonna fall off...Stupid sinuses...and my throat was being all itchy...And this morning it got worse.
And damnit, I forgot to take my meds...::mummble mummble::

Hehe, it was funny at practice. People kept asking me why I hadn't been to practice for the past month or so...and I'd say I was sick...and they'd ask with what...Hehe, and so I'd say arsenic poisioning and radiation poisioning.
50% of the people I told that too looked like they wanted to take a step back from me. Everyone else just gave me this blank look like they were trying to figure out how the hell I could have gotten into anything with radiation.
Got a laugh out of that.

::heaves sigh:: Man, I feel like I've been really dim lately...
Like, last night Eric IMed me...and we were talking about how we could have gotten this cold. And I said something about picking on Nae about it.
I didn't mean it like she gave it to us seriously.
But she mentioned something about it today, like, I dunno...And then I remembered that she was saying that people were blaming stuff on her when it wasn't her fault. I felt like an idiot. I didn't mean to add to that.

But yeah...I need to go make supper now...

Crys~

Hmm...I feel like being all philosophical...But if I try to write it all down it'll jinx it like usual so I guess I'll just keep it to my self and write about yesterday (Sun.)

Lez see...I had to baby-sit the kids over the weekend. Trevor and Bethany.
Spencer was at my grandmother's in Mountainair.
Uncle Bruce wanted someone to be at his house on Sat that way we could keep an eye on his dogs and the house so no one would sneak in or something....And he wanted us to keep the fire going so that the heating bill wouldn't be too high.
So...I left pretty early on Sat for their house. Got there, got a whole bunch of wood...and Trevor kept bitching that he wanted to start the fire...And damnit, I wanted to do it, but whatever, so I walked out of the room thinking that Bruce had probably shown them how to do it....Well, Trevor couldn't get it started...so I did it.
And Trevor being Trevor I made sure to tell him he was a loser. Hehe.


Ok, that's it, I need caffeine...::runs to get coffee::
Mmm...

So, anyway...yeah, Trevor is a choad.
I let them a movie for every hour and a half they worked. They didn't watch that many movies...but eh...So, I was entertaining myself on their computer with Solitaire because they didn't have internet access and he come up behind me and grabs some of my hair and pulls.
I don't say anything, just turn around and elbow him in the solar plex.
I'm starting to think he enjoys pain...'cuz as soon as he caught his breath he started giggling and then ran away only to come back 5 minutes later to do it again and once again not move fast enough.
Got to where he couldn't sneak up on my because he'd be giggling so hard he couldn't breath and couldn't see because his eyes were watering.

I got sick of him so every time he did something to piss me off I told him he earned one random smack. I had to explain to him that that meant that sometime during the day, or night, I would smack him without warning. He got really paranoid after that. ::evil grin::

Then he'd forget and walk by me or something and I would punch him in the gut, stomach, or solar plex. It was fun.
I don't usually do that because I just don't like beating up on little kids...but Trevor is 12 now...and he deserves it...pip squeak.

Anyhoo.
Sun. Trevor wanted to stay at the house with Aric so I let him and Bethany came with me.
Ian was being an ass. I'm gonna smack him next time.
And then Adam, this new fencer guy, was there. And they gave him a slauger....that was an unsafe move...I don't know who did it. I think my uncle did...I'll have to talk to him about it...
But yeah, I was fighting him and not only did he lunge at me and get through my guard but he also did this hop and and took a step forward and pegged me in the ribs on my left side. Damn that hurt. For the first 10 minutes it hurt to breath and so I had to stop fighting.
Damnit

So, now I'm all sore.

I saw Brotherhood of the Wolf last night with Nae and Brett. That was fun. I was able to unwind a little bit.

My fingers are getting really cold so I guess I should go and see if I can find my gloves.

Buh bye

Just aimless babbling

[Nov. 2nd, 2002|08:51 am]
[ mood | cold ]
[ music | "Exil" by Enya ]

Why does it have to be so cold??
This sucks. I now remember why I don't really like winter.
It's all pretty but....Yeah.
Anyhoo

Picked the kids up yesterday. Bruce wants me to stay the night at his place on Sat....Eww. But, it might be warmer there then here. There's just no internet....::sniff::
Yeah, I'm adicted and proud of it.

Had fun on Halloween. Got to hang out with Brett and Nae ::grin::
Had some candy of course.
lol, Julie was being all perverted. It was funny.
Marty and Holly were really pissing me off though....They were fine until we left for the Kerwin's (sp)

I seriously think we need to find somewhere else to hang out. It's just not fun at the Dodd house anymore. You have Holly bitching at you the whole time and then Marty being all..."Let's do something"
Maybe Marty should get a job...then he will know why we just want to relax and hang out rather then sack the town.

I'm gonna be a computer techi ::says in sing song voice:: Yay
Mmm...sun...can't see computer screen now.
It bites. You have to have the shades closed or you can't see the screen...but, if they're not open then you freeze to death because of the huge fan that blows out of the computer and into your face...So, yeah...
Need hot chocolate...or coffee creamer...For coffee...Mmm....caffeine.
I probably need to go take my meds...Maybe that will get rid of this headache.

I don't want to go to War next year. But, I need to get something that one of the merchants there sell...Dangit...


Aric is being a shit head...
Once again he's shoving all of his chores onto me and getting away with it because he goes and tells my parents that since he's working I should be the one to do them because he doesn't have time to. Bull.
When I work, I still have to do all my chores plus his.
Grrr...And then they all yell at me because I end up getting the chores done in the afternoon rather then in the morning.
But, Aric doesn't get yelled at when he's playing a game until noon and then goes and does the chores...
I've noticed that my mom doesn't like arguing with Aric....Because he's so stubborn...So she'll nag me until I do it....

Son of a biotch...My grandma just brought over more groceries....Not that that's really bad...but now my mom will insist on pay her back with money we don't have....Which means she'll get dad in a pissed off mood...then she'll put me in the middle...and dad will put me in charge of money...and so then she'll bitch and moan because I wont let her spend any....

Really wish I could go hide...or run away right now...Actually...I think I will...I just have to pry the kids away from the X-Box...

Crys~